Does that ump need glasses?

It's a question that has been asked for a long time. And I don't think Jim Joyce would look too bad with the right frames (some aluminum frames would look killer with that southern highway mustache).

Obviously it was a boner of a call; and everyone, including the ump, knows it. But I don't think it's time to start radically altering the sport with instant replay because of a bad call. Umps have made bad calls since there have been umps- and they have always needed better and thicker glasses (and have been reminded of this fact by crazy and casual fan alike). How many perfect games have been ruined by a bad call in the first inning? Because it is so much less dramatic, and because it is impossible to say how many possible perfecto's were ruined by an early bad call throwing off the pitcher's rhythm, no one has ever kept track. There have been hundreds of one hit performances- how many of those can be attributed to a bad call or break?

The solution? If every MLB player chips in a hundredth of a percent of their salary, the league will have enough bread to buy the thickest, most performance enhancing glasses there have ever been. The answer is always thicker lenses. Spread 'em around.